A thought that has come to my mind often when I go to sleep after a reeeaaally busy saturday/sunday is why didn’t I get round to do all the things I planned?? Even though I have been on my feet all day; In the garden replanting some helpless plants to a new and larger flowerpot. In the kitchen baking pancakes for the kids to snack on, doing the dishes, then prepping Baby V’s dinner. In the basement doing laundry.. Cleaning the bathroom, changing all bedlinen in the house (looove clean bedlinen so changing the bedlinen happens quite often in our house). Vacuuming, talking the dog for a walk, shopping for dinner and the kids’ packed lunches.. all in all some very busy days (.. deep breath..).
So why are there still a hundred different other things that I feel that I should have done as well?
I love my current ‘job’ as a housewife, on maternity leave and as a mother and I am not bored doing the housework (not bored yet, anyway). I must be a time-optimist 😉 Always thinking that I can do more with my daytime hours than possible. And today I was so hoping that I’ve had time for more baking, more cooking, more cleaning, more playing with the kids – always, more time for my hobby (this blog) and more time for me (reading books, listening to music, or re-arranging something in the house: pillows, candles, blankets, flowers). But.. sigh.. the kids have all gone to sleep and day has gone into evening/night.
How does this work for me? How does it work for anyone with babies, or small kids, or many kids?
The magic happens in the moments in between , so to speak :)) In between all the need-to-dos of the day, we make it fun! Though there are chores around the house, we take it bit by bit and always remember to take our time to do all the things that we love as well.
For example eating ice cream with the older kids in the sofa in front of the TV watching The Great Danish Bake Off. Or finding a dozen plastic spiders under my bedspread put there by little halloween monsters to scare me… oh yes it did work, I’m so not a big fan of spiders…
But it is not all for the kids. We must also find a way to make room for each other in our marriage. And after having three babies, we sort of have some experience with this. (Although we do, sometimes, forget and then fail, just like everyone else). It is so important that we as parents not only sacrifice ourselves for our family. The individual must not disappear in order to make room for only the family and I for one can advocate that we as parents must remember our hobbies and passions, be it painting, reading, knitting, spending time with friends and family or going fishing.
Over the years I have found that a something very important for keeping our marriage healthy is exercise. For me this works perfectly when I go for a really long walk with Baby V in her baby carriage. In the weekends this means that my husband takes care of the older kids (something that he does better than anyone else in world). Great for me 🙂 For my husband it means doing his cross fit routine in the garden. None of these things is a big invasion in our lives and it means that we stay happy and focused the rest of the time.
And how to make room for each other? Well, just like that, just do it, prioritize. It’s ok that you don’t get round to doing the last few things, skip washing the floors or making the perfect family dinner (or of course do it, if this is your priority, hihi). It is ok that the house is not in perfect condition or that you get someone else to pick up the kids from school tomorrow (grandparents, nanny, the kids’ friends’ mothers), if you just promise to prioritize yourself. Your family will love you for it. Your new energy will pass on to them. Get going. Have fun. Enjoy!